One of my “goals” for this year (since I don’t make resolutions) has been to take more risks. I feel like I’ve done a pretty fair job, especially considering some of the things I’ve been faced with.
The problem I’m still facing is that I have “something to do” such as update this blog. I think about doing it (or writing something or whatever it is that I need “to do”), but the longer I take to accomplish this task, the more I think about the consequences of my lack of action, and the fear throttles me and keeps me from acting.
Let me simply things: fear cripples me on a regular basis. I don’t mean physically, but it’s always easier to sit on the couch and watch any episode of any show on Netflix than it is to actually act. It’s always easier to avoid writing than it is to write, to think about calling someone instead of doing so, or planning how you will clean the house rather than doing it.
I’ve always been a planner. I’m great at making plans and organizing them. I can schedule out an entire day down to the minute, but following that plan seems to be my greatest weakness. It’s what keeps me from eating right or going for a walk or writing a novel a month.
What I need to do, and what I’m focusing on, is moving forward one step at a time. I’m trying to face the things that scare me (admitting that I may have failed?) and accept that I only have today to accomplish my goals.